Our Common Shame

So everyone knows I'm unemployed and searching in ernest for gainful employment. Okay, so I don't really look so much as browse on occasion... if I get a notice that I find interesting.. on a day I am not busy. Don't JUDGE ME!

Aaaannnyway. I get a message in the inbox of one of my many job search sites for an Administrative Assistant job posting. The job posting says to apply in person at such and such location. Right off the bat, I can tell we aren't talking about the high end sort of job. But I actually fixed my hair and put on makeup this morning so I'm already ready. And since I have nothing better to do (ie my farm doesn't need harvesting) I slap on something a little nicer than my Tweety Bird PJ pants and a UTEP Tshirt (coffee stained - of course) and head out.

So I get to this office/ frac yard on the west side of town. The building and yard look fairly new, good sign. I was half expecting a tilting shack with caliche parking lot. (Hey.. spell check doesn't know what caliche is haha) I go in to a small receiving office inside the front door with an empty desk occupying most of the room. This is NOT a good sign since I have no desire to be a receptionist and the empty desk there makes me think this is what they are looking for. But I resist the temptation to turn around and go home.

The rest of the space is taken up by three other burden's upon society. Two men and a rather unattractive woman.

Poor thing... she doesn't have a chance in hell of getting a front desk job with that face. I know, I know - that is a terribly callous and unprofessional way to view things but I have been in this rodeo for 6 months now and have learned some hard truths. If you have warts on your face, your outfit is circa 1975, and you have an ass bigger than a size 4 - I have two words for you.. Call Center.

Oh back to the office. (Does anyone else get sidetracked this easily) So there are now 4 of us waiting to see someone about applying for a job. See these people were smart I tell ya. They posted three different jobs to be filled ... all at the same time! And they don't want to deal with a million phone calls and setting up a million appointments, so they just say "come on in". How EFFICIENT! And of course since I'm there and we know how my luck is, there is only one person in this office today to take care of the 4 applicants in the waiting area and the two in the back filling out forms. What a fantastic opportunity for some bonding with would be dispatchers, truck drivers, and administrative assistants. (The three positions they are hiring for)

You might think this level of non-planning made me a little twitchy or might have tempted me to voice my suggestions to the person in charge as to how they might have planned this hiring event juuuust a wee bit better. But no, I smothered any temptation I might have had in the hopes of not alienating a potential employer. Since there is nothing to do now but wait - I began to do what I do. These people might have been under the impression they were there to apply for a job, but alas they are to become my entertainment.

I started up a conversation with the other bums.. applicants in the room. I mean, we are elbow to elbow so might as well make the best of it. I started cagey, a little weather talk, a little football talk, and then a little deeper with some talk of how the oilfield is starting to pick up steam.

Then I dig a little deeper. Which brings me to the point of my entry today (FINALLY), I was absolutely elated to find out that the subjugation of my free will to Facebook applications is NOT my fault. It is merely a result of my being unemployed. After some initial small talk, I extracted a confession of like subjugation from every person there. (my skills in interrogation are really something impressive to behold) The truck drivers told of their recent halloween decorations on Farmtown. The Dispatcher confessed his angst over not being able to expand his farm in Farmville. He just couldn't squeeze another thing onto his farm and broke out in a rash when he tried to sell one of his cows. The secretary was overjoyed at the fact that one might remove the spaces between the crops. The wonder in her eyes as I explained how this magnificent feat could be accomplished was more gratifying than I can put into words. It was such a magical moment, finding other lost and shamed souls in the dark.

EUREKA!! I couldn't have been happier if I had discovered the chemical process for turning metal into gold. For I can now say... Take heart my fellow out of work Americans. Though you may feel weak and ashamed of your collapse into complete FB addiction... you are NOT alone. People from all walks of life, (at least truck drivers, dispatchers, and secretaries) and from all over the country have succumbed to these same temptations. It is not your fault. You are not a lazy, unmotivated, socially corrupt burden upon society. You are merely a victim of circumstance. So, plow, harvest, plant, and decorate until your little fingers bleed and your wrist completely breaks down. Because soon you will find a job, you will have better things to do, and these wounds will heal.

I am Not a Quitter

.. just a procrastinator.

As I predicted, school and football have kept me from the keyboard much more than I would have liked over the past couple of months. School is going well and providing me with many observations to share. Football... well let's just not go there.

Since I endeavor to be completely honest with - well - whoever is paying attention to my ramblings, I must admit that naps have also become a big part of my day. I like to think I'm not alone in my love/ need for the afternoon nap.

• Mexico, as a nation, pretty much shuts down for their afternoon Siesta.
  
• Facebook has a whole page devoted to naps (I'm a fan).
  
• Google brings back over 230,000 web pages that answer the question, "The Importance of Naps".
  
• Wiki has a page that tells one How to Nap. (For the developmentally challenged or Type A personality)
  

So I vow not to be ashamed that I now look forward to this whole nap thing, schedule waking activities around it, and get quite pissy if I miss it. Funny that I used to cry, scream, fight, and scheme against my mother to keep from taking a nap. What was I thinking??

Lastly, my blog has also suffered greatly from an insidious cankerworm to productivity. More widely known as the Facebook Application. Farmville, Farmtown, YoVille, Barn Buddy, Treasure Mania, and others have slowly and completely taken over my free time. And being that I am an unemployed burden upon society, and internet student, and an avid napper - that's saying something.

Laugh if you will, you obviously have not experienced the pure joy of clicking on 650 little squares to plow, 650 squares to plant, and 650 squares again to harvest your virtual fields-a-plenty.

Or going to "work" in a factory to earn virtual money, to buy virtual crap to fill your virtual apartment.

Then there is the square clicking to find virtual treasure, to add to virtual collections, to donate to a museum you can't visit.. all in the attempt to gain more health.

My LORD in Heaven above, has there ever been a grander and more fulfilling avocation known to humankind?? Did Michelangelo step back from his David upon it's completion with as much satisfaction as I feel when I peruse my fully bloomed and ready to harvest farm called Redneck Acres? Surely not.

As with all grand endeavors, an unimaginative and meager soul might mistakenly ask "Why?". I can only answer as those before me answered when faced with such an unanswerable enigma , "because it's there".

That's all for now - gotta get my peppers in before they go to waste. ;)